Unconditional Love.

 10.08.2020 

A day where I took up the courage to call and confronted him, who sexually molested me when I was 10.

I am 28 this year and it hasn't been easy. 

One incident branched out a lot of beliefs that have held me back in life for so long and I, want to simply thank myself, for taking up the responsibility to regain my power in my own life. 

18 years had passed. I have learned that forgiveness is one of the ways to experience unconditional love. I have experienced it today and I would love to share what I understand from it with you. 

What are the differences between conditional love and unconditional love?

Conditional love is he has to do this and that to redeem himself for doing what he did. Unconditional love in forgiveness is I forgive despite he apologizes or not, despite how he reacted, I still choose to forgive him and I set myself free from this sexual trauma. I detached myself from it. I told him how he affected my life and all I wanted is for him to listen, not even apologizing. Then, without him apologizing, I told him I forgive him for what he did. The act of him wanting to listen is unconditional love from him to me already. 

What if he refuses to listen? Well, I still forgive him because by me taking up the courage to call him is sufficient enough for me to know that I am capable of protecting myself and speaking my truth. That is an unconditional love for myself. 

Unconditional love is never about attachment, is detachment. For example, if your bf wants to leave you to chase his dream, you will let him go and give him blessing because loving someone is to never about having him all by yourself, is letting him be who he truly wants to be.  

Having the expectation in a person to act in a certain way is also conditional love. Have you ever encountered friends who expected you to do this and that, to react in a certain way? When we meet someone, we only see the side they wanted us to see, and when 'new' side was introduced, they judged immediately saying 'this is not the xx I know, I don't like it."

Well, right now, for me, you don't have to like me because I love myself enough to not need your validation. But I respect and understand why you didn't like it and I am open for discussion. But never jump to a conclusion immediately saying he or she had changed. They didn't. Ask before assuming to understand, not to reply. 

I still have a long way to go in understanding the true definition of unconditional love but I am getting there, day by day and I will be spreading unconditional love to everyone I know. Will I make mistake in understanding this beautiful art of unconditional love? Yes, and it is okay to make mistake because we are all learning isn't? This is also an act of unconditional love. 

Sending Unicorn Love and Blessing to you as you're reading this :)


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